Ellen DeGeneres aka the sweetest person alive
Oh, so women can’t dress how they want because men can’t control their sexual urges? When dogs can’t control their sexual urges, we cut off their balls.
I think I’m onto something here.
Well, you know…shit.
why would you pay someone for 26-51 weeks for doing nothing
you have a very, very odd definition of “doing nothing”.
Living as a woman in the USA in a nutshell:
- If you don’t have sex, you’re a prude and a bitch.
- If you have sex outside of marriage and use birth control to avoid getting pregnant, you’re a slut (whether you’ve had sex twice every day or twice in a year).
- If you have sex outside of marriage, but don’t use protection and get pregnant, you’re a slut AND you’re stupid
- If you’re single and get an abortion because you can’t afford to take time off work to push a baby the size of a melon out of your cooch, you’re a slut, stupid, AND a murderer.
- If you’re single but don’t get an abortion, but need extra governmental help to assist in raising your child you were pressured to keep because of someone else’s moral code, you’re a slut, stupid, a leech on the back of society, AND shit out of luck.
AND THE HOOOOME OF THEEEEE BRAAAAAVE
And if you’re married and have a baby, apparently raising that child is “doing nothing” and you don’t deserve to be paid maternity leave but if you don’t want to have children with your spouse or can’t have children, you “aren’t doing your duty as a wife”/”aren’t a real woman”
like nah fuck outta here.
You really can’t fucking win with some people
North Korea gives mothers paid leave. North Korea. NORTH KOREA. NORTH KOREA!!!!And America doesn’t!
Savages. We the US are savages.
dentist: *shoots you* you’re bleeding b/c you dont floss
there are some days where i forget to eat the entire day, and then there are other days where i have first breakfast, second breakfast, elevenses, luncheon, third breakfast, tea, dinner, soupsies, supper, night lunch, midnight snack and one-in-the-morning snack
Snails Kiss On Cherries [photo by Vyacheslav Mishchenk]
THIS IS EVERYTHING I WANT MY LIFE TO BE
was voldemort a virgin
Imagine being the chick to do the frick frack with the Dark Lord Voldy.
TUMBLR DOT COM: WHERE WE CAN DISCUSS HAVING SEX WITH VOLDEMORT BUT WE CAN’T ACTUALLY SAY THE WORD SEX
doing the do with you know who
I’M SO FUCKING DONE WITH THIS WEBSITE
he who must not be laid
Ain’t no party like a Microsoft paint party
i like how the gray/black/white squares are like
“can u not”
is this asshole taunting me
Space, guys… SPACE!!!!
I kinda want all of these tattoo’d on me
fyi, these make really great phone wallpaper…